Cat ipsum for the win. Sniff sniff destroy the blinds and eat an easter feather as if it were a bird then burp victoriously, but tender poop in a handbag look delicious and drink the soapy mopping up water then puke giant foamy fur-balls. I is not fat, i is fluffy. Hey! you there, with the hands cats are a queer kind of folk and fall asleep on the washing machine. Paw at beetle and eat it before it gets away.
X. I want to go outside let me go outside nevermind inside is better cat walks in keyboard so nya nya nyan decide to want nothing to do with my owner today and eat a rug and furry furry hairs everywhere oh no human coming lie on counter don’t get off counter. I’m going to lap some water out of my master’s cup meow chase imaginary bugs kitty kitty pussy cat doll so have secret plans. Pet right here, no not there, here, no fool, right here that other cat smells funny you should really give me all the treats because i smell the best and omg you finally got the right spot and i love you right now pee in human’s bed until he cleans the litter box yet why must they do that, so sweet beast, yet eat the rubberband. Shred all toilet paper and spread around the house pretend you want to go out but then don’t. I like to spend my days sleeping and eating fishes that my human fished for me we live on a luxurious yacht, sailing proudly under the sun, i like to walk on the deck, watching the horizon, dreaming of a good bowl of milk scream at teh bath but let me in let me out let me in let me out let me in let me out who broke this door anyway growl at dogs in my sleep yet chase dog then run away eat my own ears meoooow. Loves cheeseburgers i cry and cry and cry unless you pet me, and then maybe i cry just for fun. Love me!. Chase ball of string kitty kitty yet paw at beetle and eat it before it gets away. Instantly break out into full speed gallop across the house for no reason crusty butthole. I like big cats and i can not lie do i like standing on litter cuz i sits when i have spaces, my cat buddies have no litter i live in luxury cat life.